Better than perfect
Imperfection is what it’s all about
I’m 85% of the way to having sewn all the patches for my fabric synth Soft Cymatics. It’s taken months! I’m proud to say I’ve finally figured out all the mysterious settings on my sewing machine. I’m becoming better at steering the fabric through the machine with fewer breaks in the thread. But I’m still no expert. I’ve accidentally sewn my thumb twice now.
Today, while creating a patch that will trigger the note F3, I made this gloriously imperfect mess of orange thread.
The other side of the patch was face up while I was sewing. It seemed like I’d done such a great job! Then I flipped it over to see that all the orange thread had gathered. I don’t even know what’s going on when that happens. But you know what, I’m leaving it that way. I sewed another layer of the conductive thread on top to secure that mess in place.
I caught myself thinking if this were one of my albums I’d fix that mess. I can’t remember a time I’ve ever purposefully left a mess like that in an album. So why am I ok with leaving this level of imperfection in my first quilt and first fabric synthesizer? Well, for one, I don’t have time. The exhibition opens on the 25th. Gotta keep moving! Two: This project isn’t about perfection. It’s about trying to figure out whether it’s possible to make a large instrument (2 metres x 2 metres) that’s foldable, unlike my other large instruments, so I can tour by train and set up for live shows without draining all my energy before the show has even begun. It’s about exploring whether it’s possible to make synths from eco-friendlier materials, in this case velvet offcuts. It’s about exploring whether playing electronic music with an instrument that’s fuzzy to touch impacts the experience.
Three: Isn’t the concept of perfection something I firmly don’t agree with in all walks of life? Ideals of perfection therefore have no business entering my creative process.
Four: In a post-AI world, who wants human-made art to be perfect? Why use your own brain to daydream up your own ideas, use your own fingers to touch chalk, scissors, rulers and moving elecrically-operated sewing needles (yowch!) to then iron out the human-made imperfection? Part of what I’ve loved about making this project is not outsourcing any of it to AI. I was surprised to discover that making such a huge tactile project over a number of months is so incredibly meditative. And I think the visible imperfections help tell this part of the story.
Five: I just really like the imperfections! They’re the details that I never intended that make the patches more beautiful to look at and to touch.
Come see Soft Cymatics at Not For Sale Gallery, Hackney Wick from 25th to 31st of January. I am pleased and surprised to announce that the first eco-friendly fabric synth building workshop has sold out… so I’ve added a new one on the 25th, 4pm-7pm.
The closing party concert lineup is epic. Huge thanks to Crux AV for collaborating on this gig. We’ll have 360 degree projections and live music by Arconic
Amousement, Force Majeure, Stormfieldand and of course me playing Soft Cymatics. And it’s BYOB. If you can’t attend in person, the event will be livestreamed on YouTube.
Nothing about this exhibition/concert/workshop series will be perfect. By embracing imperfection I’ve been able to approach this exhibition with minimal anxiety. Not For Sale Gallery have also played a part in me not getting anxious as they’ve encouraged me to bring whatever I want to this exhibition and use the space and time however I like. They don’t seem to have any pre-formed idea of what ‘perfect’ could be in this context. As an artist living with Complex PTSD I really appreciate that.
On that note, do you want to do a fully funded PhD on the topic of instrument design by and for disabled musicians? Click here for more info. Applications close on the 15th of February.
Hope to see you next week. Until then, stay imperfect. XO Lia
